Parking Lot Theatre : Gloss

Parking Lot Theatre

Concrete Syntax

At the end of the service, we were all requested to form a circle and greet the person parked next to us.  It took some time to get all the cars aligned. The luxury sedans were jockeying for position rather aggressively. And the smaller coupes were trying to avoid the much larger utility vehicles, which, due to the size differential, required their drivers to crane upward out the window to converse.

Everyone steered clear of the oil-streaked hatchback with its glass shot out, its engine vibrating like a jackhammer. The church is committed to the principle of unity and equality of all, except for them.

Once the pairings were settled, the matter of who should be required to clamber over to the passenger seat to hear the other driver, which had not been clarified beforehand, caused much confusion and delay. Some, like myself, had deliberately avoided parking too close, requiring some additional maneuvering to bridge the distance, the cumulative rumble of idling engines having made it progressively difficult to hear.

One driver was so angry about this that he nearly blew the roof off his convertible.

Across the way, I noticed a red minicar that had gotten stuck with a Prime Mover, one of those mammoth homes-on-the-move that one never sees parked. I thanked the Lord that it was not me in that minicar.

The driver with whom I was partnered was unable to lower his window, which required him to communicate with nonverbal indicators that I could not understand. My lack of comprehension caused him to pantomime in an exaggerated fashion, like a burlesque. I adjusted the zoom on my ocular fittings, then opened the door, causing a part  to fall out, but this only seemed to frighten him and he drove away.


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